The Kirk Minihane show is in a bit of a pickle. For a lot of you who don't know the show, I'm going to keep it short and simple... like my sexual endurance. It's an incredible show. These last two weeks have been a beautiful example of how a show can capitalize on stupid people while also being creative with said stupid people. For instance, Kirk was able to shove three fans into the back seat of a filthy Honda Accord for twelve hours all while being live streamed through a shitty phone connection. Shit like this is what keeps me sucking on this content filled tit that is attached to Kirk. To get to that "pickle" that I mentioned. Kirk is intense and because of this intensity he burns through producers like I burn through anti-depressants. The latest producer, Dave Cullinane, is out after a "shitty showing" at a live show in Plymouth. Granted the previous live shows were very good and produced very well. Somehow, we are here, my guy Dave is leaving the show and I'm going to defend him for a second. Kirk likes to make fun of other podcasts that have such a big production crew for live shows. Is KMS the Joe Rogan Experience, Call Her Daddy, or The Blind Mike Project? Obviously not. The show is big enough that I think it's tough for a podcast producer to run a show 3-5 times a week, find topics, find clips and sound, schedule trips for Barstool events and on top of that run KMS social accounts. With all those tasks you are also asking a producer to rent a theater, set up food and alcohol, music, pre-shows, etc. I'm going to get off Dave's dong for a second and give a solution. Keep Dave Cullinane. Have Dave do the day-to-day podcast. Hire the GOAT Steve Robinson part-time to ONLY to set up live events so he can keep doing his right-wing propaganda site and make the KMS live shows better. Then hire a grunt also part-time to work on X (Twitter), Instagram, Youtube, and TikTok. I'm a genius. You are all welcome Minifans and we can stop this torturous, yet entertaining producer search.
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Vitality did there thing. Won Worlds and made the Grand Finals look like pool play against a poor open team. That poor open team was the defending RLCS world champions, team BDS. This Vitality roster is the greatest roster to ever play the game to date. I'm sure many of you would say Fairy Peak, Kaydop, and Turbo, but you'd be absolutely wrong. Sure, they are the most successful rostervon paper, but when it comes to pure talent Zen, Radosin, and Alpha54 take the titanium white cake. Let's be honest, the field is at an all-time high in the RLCS and Vitality is spreading cheeks well beyond the recommended spreading limits. While I was watching Worlds my phone chimed indicating that I had a notification regarding an email. It was a Twitch subscription invoice. Since I have only subscribed to one streamer, I knew it was the SBF, Scrooge McDuck, Bernie Madoff, of Rocket League...Mr. Ponzi scheme himself, Jessie. This lunatic makes a YouTube video announcing his return to Rocket League after nearly a gestation of a human (That's 9 months). This scam artist "returns", talks about "the streaming grind" and after just three days of streaming and subs pouring in because the "best streamer that Make-A-Wish Esports has ever produced is back baby", his PC magically dies. A quiet three weeks go by and no content. Nothing. Not even a "Jessie being Jessie" video (Which comes out every Friday btw...KEKW). Oh, what's that? Jessie's dead PC is powered by sponsorship money and RISES FROM THE ASHES for a paid Dropshot stream? Shout out Pringles. Remember. Once you pop, the fun won't stop. That was his last stream as of now... two months ago. I may be delusional by giving this man money every month and literally getting ZERO value back, but I can't quit him. I wish Jessie would just come home with the milk and cigarettes already, but until then it looks like Fruity will be raising me...I mean entertaining me until that fucking deadbeat comes back.
I was doing my daily doom scrolling of Twitter and when I got past the political nut bags and people trying to sell their OnlyFans to me I saw a tweet from Valve. Valve finally announced Counter-Strike 2. I was pumped, the god father of competitive FPS is getting a new game. That excited was extinguished...slightly when I discovered that it's basically a graphical and quality of life update to Counter Strike Global Offensive. New smoke physics, better character models, better lighting, and 128 tick server's baby! I'm going to be brutally honest here. If your aim sucked in CSGO the 128 tick servers in CS2 are not going to be your saving grace. If you sucked at CS today, you will most likely suck at CS in 6 months. With that said, the people tweeting "New game, New Me" please, politely wake up and flush those dreams down the toilet you will not see Global Elite.
Some people, but not this guy, are beginning to compare the release of Overwatch 2 to Counter Strike 2. I'm going to squash this bug right now. When Overwatch 2 was announced Blizzard made the game seem like this completely new multiplayer experience. Fast forward a couple months and the game is back to struggling to gain and keep new players. CS2 is NOT being advertised as a new game, its being treated as a major update. And that's what it is. The same game with new shiny and better working parts. What the hell is casually competitive? Let my magical words and brilliant brain explain. After many years of competing and shredding the competition I've grown tired of the grind, the scrims, the aim training...not that I need it. And after 15+ years of "competing" it gets to you, but taking games less seriously normally results in becoming worse at whatever game you've been playing. Luckily, I have not taken a real hit in my skill now that I have gone "casually competitive". I sound like I'm about to explain a new religion, but casually competitive to me just means you are someone who enjoys a ranked, "balanced", and competitive experience while not allowing the results of a match get to you. I'm still going for the win, I'm calling out, I'm absolutely not missing a shot (per usual), but if we lose it's...whatever. I'm not breaking down what the hell went wrong, watching replays/VODS, I'm just going on to the next match. This has made my gaming life much more enjoyable. I'll jump on COD, Rocket League or whatever it may be and I'm treating ranked as something that I enjoy competing in, but with more of a "let's see what happens" mindset rather than "we got to win this". I'm telling you people this is the way to go. I have always valued gameplay over graphics, but if something looked outdated even if the creators were intentionally going for a retro looking game, I definitely was more likely to look past it. Luckily, that has changed for me since playing some of the games coming from this resurrection of the "boomer shooters". I instantly need to get this off my chest, the term "boomer shooter" is fucking stupid. This term is used to describe games that are Doom-like, 90's style, or as some call them "arena shooters". I can't stand making genres more complicated than they need to be. I blame hipsters, they love making sub-genres. Anyways, I've been trying to step away from multiplayer games and start giving single players games a chance. Problem is I like shooters. Shooters in the last 15 years primarily focus on multiplayer. Thanks to the release of games like Doom (2016) a rise of single player shooters has exploded. Ultra Kill, Turbo Overkill, Amid Evil, Project Warlock, and the granddaddy of new age boomer shooters... Dusk. Dusk is such an incredible game. The movement is so smooth and easy to understand, but when mastered can bring the gameplay to a whole new level. The weaponry is very basic on paper but executed perfectly. The shotgun and super shotgun are meaty and intoxicating. Pistols are weak but will save you when you are put in a tight "oh shit" scenario. I fell in love with the hunting rifle. Single shot, super accurate, high damage just a fps fans wet dream. With Dusk the story is told through very minimal dialogue and mostly told through the environments that you find yourself in. Speaking of the environments, the level design is just chef's kiss. From fast-paced and interesting arenas to moments of nothingness in a dark, unsettling, and horrifying place, Dusk keeps you guessing in the best ways possible. Dusk is the perfect example of not judging a game by its cover... or in this case polygons. In fact, Dusk should be a shining example shown to every single aspiring game developer. Call the class "Fucking Perfection 101" Battlefield games have always been my favorite "casual" fps games growing up. After a day of practice or scrims in whatever game I was competing in at the time CS, Quake, Halo, COD, or whatever the flavor of the year was for me, it was nice to pop on a Battlefield game and not care about doing well. The games are made to be chaotic and for a lack of better words "random" in a sense. And in a Battlefield game that is exactly the thing I am looking for. With Battlefield, I don't give a shit about learning angles, utility usage, set ups, spawn traps, and the rest of the things that come to my mind when I play a more "balanced" and "competitive" 4v4/5v5 shooter. Battlefield lets me be a neanderthal with a gun. Battlefield 2042 if you don't know is one of the most objectively hated games to ever be released. I did not play the game on release, but the Twitter timeline was full of crazy clips of the game just imploding on itself. Hovercrafts could scale the sides of skyscrapers, you could spawn under the map, bullets would go feet from where you were actually aiming. Just do yourself a favor and YouTube "2042 Bug Compilation" and feast those eyes until they go crossed. The reason why my brain is on Battlefield is because a couple of weeks ago it was on a sale for 15 dollars via Steam. Before that, Battlefield 1 was 5 dollars on steam and that was one of the most immersive games I have ever touched. I know many of the Battlefield hardcore fans aren't impressed with its mechanics, but in my humble, yet accurate opinion it's still one of the greatest online multiplayer experiences you can ever allow yourself to have. Battlefield 2042...is an experience. Not an immersive experience. I don't even know what to call it. When you can shoot your gun at actual players it's not terrible. When I can spawn on one of my squad mates without being put DIRECTLY in an enemy's line of sight it's not terrible. When I'm not surrounded by tanks, helicopters, or transport vehicles that have fucking cannons attached to them it's not terrible. The game has INSANE "clip potential" and as frustrating as the game is, getting a nice multi-kill is very satisfying. I also feel like it's the last standing "pub stomping" games left out there. If you are above average at shooters, you will do pretty well...in general as long as your encounters with the fleet of vehicles is low. The skill-based matchmaking that makes you sweat your ass off in casual matches in games like COD or Halo is much milder in this game. Which is a breath of... not fresh air because this game is not that, it's more of a breath of "did you fart? Or is that low tide?" kind of air. As much as this game makes me want to throw my mouse across my office I do think if this game goes on sale for 10 bucks...people should buy it and give it a go. If you do, good luck and use a controller or mouse and keyboard that you are comfortable with breaking.
This has always been an interesting topic for me personally because as I have grown as a content creator and my audience has somehow gotten younger, I've hit this situation more than any other time in my career. That situation being when a viewer posts some heavy life shit in the chat. Such as depression, breakups, death in the family, etc. It is a crazy honor for someone to feel like they can unload these feeling onto you and for some illogical reason look to you for advice while they traverse this dark time in their life. At the same time, it's a tough dance to play when it comes to reacting to tragic news from a fan and in front of other viewers who are there to watch and have a good time. We also live in a time where people (especially kids) will pull at whatever heart strings you have as a streamer to have your attention and hear their name come out of your mouth. This is obviously a rare occurrence, but it does and can happen. Personally, the way I handle it is, if my stream is kind of slow and someone drops terrible news in the chat, I will 99% of the time talk about their scenario and give them the time to vent. Talk it out. If the stream is doing well, lots of viewers, chat is moving, and someone post tragic news in the chat I will verbally acknowledge the message and tell them to DM me so we can chat after the stream. I think I have a good way of doing things, but I found a streamer who... has a bit of a different approach.
Before I give my perfect opinion on this situation let me just give a TLDR verdict. MissNerdyCurvy (the "victim") and WeFoundTheBody (dickhead streamer) are both wrong and both right. It's like premarital sex...no one wins. If you haven't done the research on this scenario let me unwrap this...quickly. MissNerdyCurvy recently lost her mother (God rest her soul) and was chatting/watching a stream. When the streamer (WeFoundTheBody) asked her how she was doing she told him her mom passed. WeFoundTheBody, who will now be call Douche Pilot going forward responded like a normal human with a soul. (Paraphrasing) "It's Friday, and We aren't going to fucking talk about that in my chat". And like a page taken from a book written by a certain North Korean dictator then went on to tell her how your "supposed" to answer the question "How are you doing?". This guy just sucks. With that said, EVERY STREAMER has their own set of rules and standards for how they run their chat. From my research Douche Pilot has made it clear that dropping this kind of trauma in his chat is looked down upon. Fine, but reacting the way he did is bananas. What was more bananas is when it came out Douche Pilot has had previous conversations with MissNerdyCurvy on this same issue. SO SHE KNEW before this incident that he was a dickhead...and was aware of this "keep it to yourself" rule I guess you could call it, and she was still shocked at the way he treated her? All signs point to this guy is a shithead and we are upset that he's a shithead? This is where I feel less bad for MissNerdyCurvy I will be honest. Like I said in my opening statement both sides here are wrong, but Douche Pilot is most definitely holding the biggest "L" in this story.
Warzone 2 is: trash, amazing, infuriating, fun, boring, heart-pumping and the embodiment of chaos. MW2 overall is addicting but terrible at the same time, much like the Burger King of video games. The experience varies wildly and ranges from "fuck yea" to "that was fucking bullshit". With a group of friends the game simultaneously becomes very fun and also a test of friendship. You will laugh. You will yell. You will question why you're playing the game. I have not purchased a Call of Duty Game since the first Black Ops released over a decade ago. This game is still CoD, albeit with some more modern features. What is not modern is the fact that the HUD in Warzone displays less useful information than the previous one from the original Warzone. As someone who never played Warzone 1 I was shocked to see the difference between the two. Aside from that there is the fact that it is much more difficult to obtain your loadout and depends more heavily on RNG. Oh, and you spawn with a 2 plate vest. Kill times feel wildly inconsistent. Weapon tuning is like an annoying minigame tacked on the game to appeal to the gun guys and prompt people to pump out user generated content about "the most OP build" on social media. By the way, weapon tuning doesn't unlock until the gun is fully leveled up and will have you questioning your sanity whether the settings make much of a difference. There are too many attachments. Too many camos. There are operators, microtransactions, a battle pass and playable skins of famous soccer players galore. The game is awful, but I cannot put it down. It feels as if it was designed by AI. Or rather data analysis that studied what players like and what is best for player retention. For example one of the maps, Crown Raceway, takes place on the inner track of a Formula 1 racetrack for no apparent reason. Players can even get killed by cars on the track if they stand close enough. The only reason I can see for this map design is "well our demographic of players (men) like fast cars so let's add them to the map". The maps have no flow, no balance and no soul. Some are even worse, but I digress. The SBMM is egregiously strict and tries to keep people as even as possible. This ruins the experience of CoD as a casual shooter to play with friends after a long day. Everyone suffers when friends of different skill levels play together, and that used to be one of my favorite parts of the franchise. Granted I'm obviously not a HUGE fan of Call of Duty, but I have fond memories of playing CoD 4, WaW, MW2 and Black Ops with friends from high school. Hell, I even played with people from school I otherwise wouldn't talk to. CoD was more than a game then. It was about the hangout. It was about seeing one guy pop off and take over the lobby. It was about getting bullshitted and complaining with your friends in a cathartic group therapy session over the game you love to hate. While SBMM may make normal matchmaking more like an oddly competitive pick up game at the park; Warzone 2 still provides that chaotic shit show I know and love and hate to admit that I enjoy named Call of Duty. The game may be terribly flawed but it is free to play and guarantees a laugh with a group. If nothing else, at least it's a change of pace. We shall see how long this rollercoaster of a honeymoon phase lasts. PS: Aim assist is OP and 2v2 Gulag blows. Carbon Monoxide As someone who has been playing rocket league since 2016, here are my current thoughts on the game and its community (8:19am MST). Last night I had the privilege and opportunity to play Rocket League with our lord and savior, Nicktacular. The following is a real time log of our play: 9:30pm: Nicktacular tweets that he’s bored of Call of Duty Modern Warfare II. He gets cute with his words and calls it “modern farewell” after playing the game for 1 day and convincing me to buy the $69.99 game. I still haven't played it and would love my money back, but whatevs. Sensing my moment, I ask — please, please sir - come back to Rocket League and teach me your ways! 10:00pm: What’s this? Nick agrees. He hops on. Sensing that I’ve been too eager to play with this man, I make him wait about 30 minutes so I don’t come across as too over-eager to play with him. Classic Pawn. 10:30pm: I tell Nick how much I love this game and him - he agrees it is the one true way. So awesome. 10:31pm: Fuck this game and fuck them mother fucking smurfs. I hate this game. I ask Nick what rank he thinks our opponent “really is” and he says, they aren’t smurfing they are just having a good game. Fuck logic man. This concept is foreign to me and seems like a conspiracy but I begrudgingly agree - but first try to guilt trip the other team into quitting because I am a father who gets limited time to play video games (pay no attention to the 50 hours of rocket league in the last two weeks). This has worked once, yet I still try.... 10:37pm: Nick: “Dude, where are you - you can’t go for a demo and leave me in a 1on1.” Pawn: “I guess that makes sense, I just thought you could handle a lil 1v1.” Nick: “Flattering, but no - its just dumb.” Pawn: Fuck you. But ya, I see what you’re saying. 10:39pm: Pawn goes for more demos. Weeeeeeeee! 10:40pm: Demos prevail and we have our best game of lives. Confirmed. There are literally ZERO errors and the fluidity of mechanics is just amazing. I LOVE ROCKET LEAGUE. Nick laughs, but wondering why the fuck Pawn won't just listen to him and stop this style of gameplay. 10:47pm: We begin our losing streak - after 4 losses in a row and virtually no comms we know its over. What has become of us? The next morning... 8:30am: Pawn browses Rocket League subreddit. /r/rocketleague to make sure I wasn’t “clipped on” or made fun of for horrendous gameplay (a daily occurrence). Look for more content from Pawn in the near future as the algorhythm of life gets in the way of any real rank progress in Rocket League.... Written by @PawnPawn15
It is no secret that I am a MEGA OpTic. It's also no secret that I do some contracted coaching work for Cloud9. With that all out there when OpTic and C9 faced each other in the GRAND FINALS of WORLDS, not a drop of my being was rooting for Cloud9 (Sorry guys, love ya though). Cloud9 was dumping on OpTic in the first set of games. I was tired of watching Bound not fucking miss a damn shot, I was tired of him even when he died because he was doing the most possible amount of damage in any given situation setting someone up for easy clean ups left and right. The man played like a 10-year veteran and it's just his rookie year. It also didn't help that the first set of games Lucid and Trippy were playing the worst Halo I have ever seen them play ALL YEAR. Incredibly, All of OpTic played insanely well and beat Cloud9 4-1 in the second set to win the WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP. Even got a delicious steak dinner in game 2 to go with the real-life steak dinner I'm sure they got after to celebrate this absolute DUB. How? How could OpTic play so poorly in the first set and play so dominate the second? Nicotine? Drugs? A good peep talk? No OpTic fans. It was bad juju that I casted on Cloud9... by popping on my Cloud 9 jersey AFTER OpTic lost the first set. Do I want thanks? Nope not a credit guy. Never have been and never will be. I'll take an OpTic job whenever though.
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